Finding motivation

is damned difficult some days. Last week, no problem...this diet..I mean lifestyle change and my elliptical were my bitches. I was the ruler of my domain. I had motivation shooting out of my ass like a bad case of the Medifarts (for those of you on Coach K's plan, you know what I'm talking about here.) This week.....nothing..nada...zip. Is it because I went off plan on vacation? Perhaps. Is it because I'm getting complacent? Shit, I hope not. Or is it because some days are just plain hard? DING DING DING!!! We have a winner here!!! I think we are so caught up in instant results, "make me skinny and make it easy" that we forget that there are very few things in life that are instant and almost nothing in life worth doing that is easy.
That's not to say that this program is the easiest, no brainer, "how could you possibly fuck this up?" plan I have ever been on and it's worked the quickest, BUT not every day is it rainbows and sunshine and kittens...today is one of those days for me. I am NOT hungry but the snack monster, binge monster, fuck it all and give me a cheeseburger monster is rearing its ugly head today. As is the work out? what's that? monster. I had my alarm set for 6 this morning, did I get up? Hell no...it's getting cold outside and my down comforter and specially made "Big D Heating Unit" were much more comfortable than my cold, dreary, man cave with the nasty ass elliptical. So in bed I stayed, until I made myself late getting out the door and totally threw my whole system out of whack. (Usually I make a shake to have while I am getting ready, so I have my first 'meal' at about 7:15....today, it was hurry out the door-grab a coffee cup and a package of oatmeal, which I did not get to eat until almost 9 a.m. which meant I was already digging into my emergency almonds at 10:15.) Normally, I would grab a bar or two, I am out of bars and due to a fucktard at TSFL headquarters my shipment was delayed by two days...GRRRRR.
I think I am already starting to stress out about the holidays, too. I am a total stress eater..ah hell, who am I kidding, I can eat when I'm happy, sad, mad, glad, doesn't matter. But stress really stresses me out. There are what 36 days until Christmas? That's two paychecks....and when I put it that way...I get really stressed out and I would like to drown my financial worries in a big 'ol plate of Kraft macaroni and cheese. (Financially, Christmas ALWAYS works out, NO ONE goes without or with gifts they don't want and the hubs always opens the check book, but just the whole IDEA of it freaks me out.)
Maybe I'm just stressing out for no particular reason...I don't know. I just know that today is a hard day. I know that when I look back on today, as I get farther along this mission, I will look back and laugh, but for today, I'm looking for that motivation anywhere I can find it.

Recpie:
I shared this one with some fellow Coach K'ers but for any newbies stalking me
Chocolate Chip Muffins
1 pkg chocolate chip pancakes
1/8 tsp (or so, I really do just grab a pinch or two)
water as directed
Mix in a glass measuring cup or coffee cup, nuke 1 minute 15 seconds. It will pop right out of the cup, split it in half squirt it with a little I Can't believe It's Not Butter Spray, enjoy...this is one of my favorites.